AN OLD ENEMY OF MINE WOULD BE MY BEST FRIEND NOW
AND AN OLD BEST FRIEND WOULD BE MY ENEMY NOW?
so basically i'm in a depressed situation where its easy to tell that i'm hating everything that has to do with my life. meaning to say, hating my life. especially school. who would've ever love school? well i used to. but not anymore since i got forced to well you know, live in boarding school and i hate it a lot. i couldnt accept every single thing that happened there. i dont know how to even tell you properly. people there, not much words to describe but more to judgemental freaks which i hate.
here's a start of the story.
my life started as a normal kiddo who didnt know anything about the school. that school was known as a top school in malaysia which i didnt even cared. will never will. so my first two months started like a newbie, where lectures and such started surprisingly. and i didnt know that would've happen. i didn't care. and a months after that, there was this huge friggin fight between me and tengku natasya a schoolmate of mine. it was big enough until the class was a bit of catastrophe and the teachers knew and they had to do a gather which made my name become idk seemed bad. so the teachers underestimated me a lot. but what they said to the teachers weren't true. I swear, but hey what could I do? i'm just an old dumbass kan. so I stay quiet, I cried every single day. me and that girl fought terribly , it was world war III.
I had a best friend, a bedmate, a deskmate, classmate and such, named sarah. she was the only one I trust that time. she was nice, but guess she couldn't accept how I am and how I was.
so there goes this dog suddenly appeared ok basically she's from second intake, and need to friggin keep the name as a secret though. every one hated her, but she just thought everyone loves her. ya Allah, she was too bossy. I swear, bossy-er than me. She kept on finding all my wrong doings and kept on correct me on every single thing I do which bugs me a lot. can you imagine, if i dont follow what she ask me to do, she'd go complain everything i do to the teacher. weh, how can you even live in that type of world? so there goes me crying and begging them to freaking stop. i couldn't take it anymore. i swear, it was the worst nightmare that ive ever had. well, gratefully by tht time, im already okay with this tengku natasya gurl, and decided to be friends. we surely regret about every single thing we did. me sarah and her was then called a clique after me and the emerald girls was called a clique. okay basically i dont understand why would they call people cliques when they were actually being friends. immature gila ya Allah. im dying.
and all those bullshit i decided to ignore since i realized it was a very immature thing to even care. they're all those people who hated me and still hates me for who I am, and I can accept that because im borned to be hated. yeap, so ended up i realized who my bestfriends are, there in ssp lah.
my best friend, ended up being someone i'm uncomfortable to be with. well she no longer can accept who I really am. maybe that's just fate, i can accept that. since i couldn't accept who she is as well. and its funny how natasya now ended up being my bestfriend, it's a big confession to tell. since i used to cry a river in front of my friends saying and complaining how tired and sad it was having fights and idk shits on the first year of high school can you even imagine. life's honestly sad.
there's this girl from melawati I knew her, but i never talked to her. Her name's Bella. so first thought of her was " she looked very nice, it would be great if we're friends" but ended up i dislike her bcz you knw some of her attitude that i dislike. and what i knew that time was " she's just an ordinary classmate that i know" you know i never expect that we'd be friends 'til now.
You know what has been happening til now? Me, tasya and bella are together being bestfriends. Do you know how weird is that? Having best friends with whom you used to hate. and honestly thats just it, we don't know that someone until something made us do. Fights made us say sorry to each other, made us realize how stupid we were, made us actually know how immature we used to be, and made us tell what did we felt those times, having honesty moments that people would never have.
Even though I just knew you guys a few months, I really hope we'd be together until the end of our school days. I don't know, i just thought you guys are the ones that well basically would listen to my stories when I need someone, would calm myself when I couldn't control my anger and others. I'm sorry for all my mistakes, hope for the best for our friendship! insya'Allah.
I honestly didn't expect all those shit was going but i'm just relieved that it's gone. But there sure will be some big fights there in my class, EVERYDAY. but ngeh, i wont be caring anymore. no time for that.
it's just sooo hard to tell how I really felt maybe this is a few that I could tell.
I'm sooo looking forward to have a happy "story" to post on my blog. hoping for the best.
Having them will never ever ever make me forget about my best girlfriends and boyfriends out there, I still love them and forever will. Don't get too offended because I know you guys get jealous too easy. sorry, hihi. love you guys
-Life was never meant to be easy. Life was created to give challenges to people to make them realize.. to actually tell them what's actually wrong whats actually right, to whom could we relate to when we have problems that we couldn't handle, and of course it's Allah swt. Life taught us how to make friends, how to communicate with people. Life teach us to respect each other. Life teaches us to be nice with each other and smile. -
